Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
why is half of my head shaved?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
