Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize