Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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