I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
