You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize