I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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