Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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