i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
