I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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