And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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