Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
