i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Randomize
