I cockslap morals
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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