I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
