Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
