kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I love you. Go after that dick
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize