He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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