I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
