yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
