The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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