hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
