so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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