i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
