WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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