Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
