I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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