Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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