OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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