i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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