thus making me awesome and them whores
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I forgot wine drunk hurts
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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