did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
