Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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