yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
