dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
