Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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