they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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