I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
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