wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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