not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
