i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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