I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
