hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
