He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
