Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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