Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
