Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
