dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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