so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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