dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
