Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
