i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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