i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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